Saturday, December 30, 2006

Night and Fog

Every time I watch Alain Resnais's film Night and Fog (1955) I am astounded by the detail and level of footage captured by the Nazis which documented their atrocities. More recently, when the photographs of Abu Ghraib prison abuses were released, I thought to myself "Why would anyone want to photographing themselves torturing another human being?"

Now, after the execution of Saddam Hussein I am again appalled that I can watch Saddam get fitted with his noose on CNN.com. Why am I able to do this? What possible good could come from me being able to watch Saddam's last moments before his execution?

I am so full of questions on why we as humans record the things we do, and what pleasure we get out of watching the suffering of others. I just don' t understand.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

A Good Holiday

For the Christmas weekend, Val and I got to visit my Grandmother. We had hoped to get to see his family but alas, airfare is just ridiculous. Then again, with DIA closing every 10 minutes because of three inches of snow, we would have just ended up moving to Seattle by default. The picture is of Val and I with what is left of the Horvath family after opening our Christmas gifts. My little 'ol Hungarian Grandmother knit us all wonderful scarves which was the best thing I could have gotten from her.

The snow is falling again here in Denver and it appears that Val's store will be closed again for most of tomorrow. Normally I wouldn't mind but damn... gotta pay the rent. Oh well.

I have taken the better part of the last week and a half off to recoup from my semester. Grades finally came in today and I ended up with an A- in my environmental science class, which ruined my 4.0 (I know, I know, leave me alone) but I should make CLAS Deans List (not that it really matters all that much). I am trying to finish really strong to increase my chances of getting into the graduate program of my choice. In fact, it looks like I will be applying to one for this fall. If I am not accepted, then I will apply to several other schools for the fall of '08 and go from there.

I'll start writing again at the beginning of the year (even though there are a number of things I could--read should--be working on now). Till then I'll keep recovering from this stomach flu and get plenty of rest. If I don't see you all before then, have the Happiest of New Years.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

World Domination

One of our Christmas gifts from Val's family was the new Risk board game. After several days of going back and forth we finally gave up on world domination and called it good. My red army held Asia pretty well against the forces of the white west.... you draw your own conclusions from that.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

The Pope's Christmas Message

In preparation for his Christmas Mass, the Pope had this to say:

"Jesus came for each one of us and made us brothers," Benedict said during his traditional blessing from his window overlooking the square.

In turn, he added, people should strive to "overcome preconceived ideas and prejudices, tear down barriers and eliminate contrasts that divide -- or worse -- set individuals and peoples against each other, so as to build together a world of justice and peace."

Sounds good, I'm in. Except that earlier in the week he had this to say:

"I cannot hide my concern about legislation on de facto couples," the Pope said.

"And so joining a man and a woman, and two people of the same sex becomes the same," Benedict said. "With that, the ominous theories that deny any relevance to the human person's masculinity and femininity are tacitly confirmed."

The second quote was part of an address where the Pope was taking on legislators who favor giving rights and recognitions to same-sex couples. So apparently, we should all get along and love each other to build toward peace, unless you are queer. Then you should abandon all that makes you who you are and assimilate into the nice culture around you... oh you apparently can't be Muslim either.

Merry Christmas from the Vatican.




Thursday, December 21, 2006

Due to extreme weather.....

this blog will close at 11:30.

For those of you who keep askingme what it was like to grow up in Alaska, it's like this from November to March. Only colder in the in between snow time. A lot colder.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

"There is a need for dreamers who can think and thinkers who can dream. The answer will not be a neatly-packaged, custom-built project. It will be a new way of looking at things."

By Ignacio Ramonet

Read more here.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Kids... don't try this at home.

I found this over at Reassigned Time, and I thought to myself, "Why the Hell not!” This is now it works:

1. Harken back to your archives.
2. Collect the first sentence you wrote every month for the whole year.
3. Entertain us.

January: “The last year already seems like a distant memory.” – not exactly ground breaking blogging.

February: Nothing—what the hell was I doing in February?

March: "Wow, how long has it been? For those who are wondering where I have been... the answer is school.” – Ah… that explains it.

April: "I find it difficult to manage my iPod and music.” – gads… am I this boring?

May: "It is really hard to believe that one week from today we'll be in Europe. – ah… yes.

June: "Pisa is only about an hour or so out of Florence on train and given it’s famous monument, we couldn’t resist.” – still in Europa

July: “Apparently a new film called Facing the Giants (2006) has landed the MPAA before the United States House of Representatives.” – back to the reality that I live in a near fascist country.

August: "At what point do we stop believing the denials of anti-Semitism?” -- Mel Who?

September: "When I woke up this morning, I was seduced first thing by the E! top 101 guilty pleasures.” -- I don’t recommend doing this.

October: "So, perhaps the reason that NeoConservative Republicans have problems supporting gay rights is that they confuse the issue.” – Ah yes Mark Foley, we remember him well.

November: "Thanks to Girlzoot for the photo.” – This was followed by yet another apology for being dark for so long.

December: "What do you do with a B.A. in English, what is my life going to be?” – borrowed from Avenue Q, and really is my theme song.

Wow… I need to post more and quit bitching about how busy I am. Here’s to more posts in 2007!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Just when you thought it was safe to go to the supermarket....

I love WorldNetDaily mostly because they give me stories like this. I mean come on, WTF is this guy actually thinking? Although, I did enter into a same-sex marriage after a couple of years of almost exclusively drinking soy milk... maybe he is on to something here.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

The Soundtrack to 2006

These are the songs for better or worse I couldn't stop listening to this year. Call it what it is.

Universal Pictures Theme

"I'm Still Here" by Elaine Stritch, Elaine Stritch At Liberty

"Mr Brightside" by The Killers, Hot Fuss

"C'est La Vie" by Bob Seger, Greatest Hits

"Filthy Gorgeous (Extended Mix)" by Scissor Sisters, Denver Wrangler Pride Mix 2006 Disk 2

"Devil's Right Hand" by Johnny Cash, Unearthed II: Trouble In Mind

"Not Ready to Make Nice" by Dixie Chicks, Not Ready to Make Nice - Single

"I Need to Wake Up" (From An Inconvenient Truth) by Melissa Etheridge, I Need to Wake Up - Single

"Gold Watch & Chain" by Garrison Keillor & Meryl Streep, A Prairie Home Companion (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)

"Amazing" (Album Version) by George Michael, Amazing

"The Gates of Istanbul" by Loreena McKennitt, An Ancient Muse (Bonus Track Version)

"For Now" by Original Broadway Cast, Avenue Q

"Nice Work If You Can Get It" by Sarah Vaughan, Billie, Ella, Lena, Sarah!

"Sylvie" by Sweet Honey in The Rock

"A Case Of You" by Joni Mitchell, Blue

"Natural Woman" by Aretha Franklin, The Big Chill

"The Wings" by Gustavo Santaolalla, Brokeback Mountain (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)

"Dear Mr. President" by P!nk featuring Indigo Girls, I'm Not Dead

"Love Generation" (Bob Sinclar Club Mix) by Bob Sinclar feat Gary Pine, Denver Wrangler Pride Mix 2006 Disk 2

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

What's next for Iraq?

Iraq is a mess. Those for words seem to finally be getting bipartisan support. Of course it has only taken 3154 coalition lives and upwards of 50,000 Iraqi lives to gain the attention of the President. The election in November seemed to help considering only one day after the election results were in, Rumsfeld issues is resignation and the Bush rhetoric about the war began to change, somewhat. The news is riddled with stories about NATO nations pulling their troops from the region continuing the hemorrhaging of Bush’s “coalition of the willing.”

Today the report prepared by a bipartisan group calling for serious changes in the way the war is being handled, has been presented its findings to the President and it will now be up to him and the assumed new Defense Secretary Robert Gates to either listen or ignore them. With an incoming Democratic Congress, the President can’t just ignore the commission’s findings like he did the 9/11 commission, placating the congress by listening and then doing very little about the findings. Still, real action will have to be seen and not promised.

Kofi Anan has declared civil war in Iraq, former Secretary of State Colin Powell has declared civil war in Iraq and even Matt Lauer has declared that Iraq is in the midst of a civil war. We now find ourselves in the middle of a fight that we don’t understand, and can’t seem to win. What is really interesting is that two days before he tendered his “resignation”, Rumsfeld wrote a memo to President Bush outlining ways that he felt the Iraq strategy could change. I don’t know if it fell on deaf ears or if Bush didn’t care, but two days later he was without a job. Could the public perception of Rumsfeld be a tow the line mirage hung before a man who really did try and make a change? I guess we’ll just have to wait for his book to come out to see.

So, with so many people calling for change, maybe the President will finally see that planning an exit strategy that leaves Iraq with a stable government and a military that can defend itself isn’t “cutting and running” but how you actually plan and execute wars. The war has now gone on longer than our involvement in WW II, maybe we can get out before Iraq goes on longer than another war that tore our Nation apart.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Shut up and Sing?

I won't bother to rehash what Natalie Mains the lead singer of the Dixie Chicks said in March of 2003 from the stage in London. If you want to see it, well there are plenty of sites that have covered the subject. What I am interested in is the reaction to her statement and the subsequent reaction to the new documentary film Shut Up & Sing (Barbera Kopple and Cecilia Peck, 2006). I have not yet had the opportunity to screen the film but judging from the trailer, and what has been written, I can guess that the film tries to strike at the central question of the conflict: should artists be political and what (if any) consequences should they face for their opinions?

From the dark ages on, one of the roles of the artist has been to question, mock and comment on society and culture. The court jester would be the only person who could question the King and get away with it. Artists express their opinions through their work, whether obvious or subtle, every day in life. Art without social comment or political significance is, well.... kinda useless decoration.

For those who think I am being cynical, let me put it a different way. Life is an incredibly complex web of conflicts, love, passion, stress, politics, culture, society (the list could go on for pages) and when our art over simplifies these issues, we end up with a false impression that life is easy. When we ignore what is happening around us, the problems which face each and every one of us compound and before long, they end up finding their way into our lives anyway, usually in incredibly violent and deadly ways.

Artists, remind us of what our world looks like. They hold a mirror up to the world and show us for our glory, beauty and ugliness. Artists should be passionate about the world in which they live and channel that passion through their work, that is how they should work. Of course it is up to the public to decide what they do with that opinion and maybe even use it to open some sort of dialogue between sides, but that isn't what happened with the Dixie Chicks. What happened to them was an attempt to silence the voice of an artist, literally and figuratively, and that is unacceptable. The reaction to the Dixie Chicks is still passionate and once again I believe that bigots and bullies relish in the anonymity of the internet to spread their message.

If we end up silencing the artistic voices, then who will be there to remind us of our humanity whether just or unjust?

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Domestic Warfare

What the hell is going on in our country?

A 14 year old boy was shot to death after egging a car.

Corporate greed of the oil industry won't be happy until every last drop of oil is sucked out of the ground.

Until we alter our paradigm to punish bad behavior instead of simply rewarding good behavior, environmental conciousness will still be a marginal issue. The problem is of course we don't pay the true cost for virgin goods, but no one really wants to hear that truth.

The choice of Rep. Keith Ellison to use the Quran has started a media storm that strikes at the core of the fear of our Nation. Watch here.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Armstrong Eat Your Heart Out

Space isn't just for Tang anymore. International Space Station residence were treated to some French haute cuisine in space. See, good things happen when the French are allowed to participate in space adventures.... fois grois anyone?

Story

Friday, December 01, 2006

World AIDS Day

The first time that I recognized World AIDS Day I was a freshman at CSU and I remember all the art on campus was draped in black cloth. The concept was to recognize a day without art. So many artists and creative souls were lost to the disease that organizers wanted us to realize what the world would look and feel like if art had died with AIDS. I remember theatres were dark and the world had to do without art, it was an incredibly powerful statement of solidarity against a disease which has taken so many.

I wear it with pride.

What Do You Do With A B.A. In English?

What do you do with a B.A. in English,
What is my life going to be?
Four years of college and plenty of knowledge,
Have earned me this useless degree.

I can't pay the bills yet,
'Cause I have no skills yet,
The world is a big scary place.

But somehow I can't shake,
The feeling I might make,
A difference,
To the human race.

-- Avenue Q

The song lyrics come from the Broadway musical Avenue Q, a show that I have yet to see but has kind of become my mantra. I am about to wrap my second to last semester of undergraduate study and I am scared as hell.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Honors Thesis Writing


Honors Thesis Writing
Originally uploaded by girlzoot.
Thanks to Girlzoot for the photo. Sorry I have been so dark lately but hopefully a post wil come soon.

Peace and Love

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

29th Starz Denver Film Festival

For ten days of every year, my life totally changes. Each November I devote most of my time and energy to one event the Starz Denver Film Festival. Over the past five years, I have worked with the festival in a variety of capacities which allow me a range of free time to enjoy the festival. This is the first year that I have worked with the festival in such a way that allows me to actually see the films and meet with the filmmakers. I can’t believe how lucky I am to be able to take part in this event.

The festival opened Thursday with the new Anthony Minghella film Breaking and Entering (2006) a rather complex film which will most likely take more than one viewing to fully appreciate. He was in attendance to accept the Mayor’s Career Achievement Award and had really interesting things to say about his film.

Unfortunately, I had to work most of the weekend so I didn’t get to screen many films but I did get to meet an incredible artist which set off a whole Hungarian wave at the festival. Vilmos Zsigmond has been the cinematographer on some of the most beautiful films (The Witches of Eastwick, Jersey Girl, The Rose, Deliverance, The Long Goodbye, just to name a few) and is an incredible man, with a inspirational story. I was honored to have a chance to meet with him and talk briefly about his work and his life. I can’t wait to see his next few films.

In conjunction with Vilmos Zsigmond’s visit, the film screened a new documentary on cinematography called Cinematographer Style (Jon Fauer, 2006) which features interviews of some of the most famous cinematographers of all time. The interviews are cut in such a way that by the end of the film, you feel as though you have watched one long interview with a single artist instead of a string of interviews with dozens. While it was a little exhausting watching, the construction was fascinating and worth the time.

Of course there are also parties and lounges to be enjoyed and I even got to have a really interesting conversation with Ian Somerhalder ("Lost", Sensation of Sight, Pulse, Rules of Attraction) about his new work and what it was like to work for Roger Avary in Rules of Attraction (Avery, 2002). And for those of you wondering, yes he is just as hot in person (if you go for that sort of thing).

Next on my list is a lineup of films directed by Womyn that are part of a series of films in the festival focusing on the Israeli and Palestinian conflict. I should have an opportunity to meet with these womyn and report back here later.

Till then, I am off to the movies.

See you in the dark.

Monday, November 06, 2006

It's like the 60s but with less hope....

Guidelines on Campaign-Related Activities by Members of the University Community

IN GENERAL, UNIVERSITY EMPLOYEES MAY NOT:

Engage in any activity during working hours designed to urge electors to vote for or against any campaign issues, which include campaigns for public office, state-wide campaign issues or referred measures, and local campaign issues or levies.

Employees wishing to participate in a campaign activity should take personal leave.

Use office supplies or equipment, including computers, telephones, printers or facsimile machines to create materials urging electors to vote for or against a campaign issue.

Use their university email accounts to urge electors to vote for or against a campaign issue, or to forward materials that urge electors to vote for or against a campaign issue.

Use university-hosted Web sites to urge electors to vote for or against a campaign issue.

SPECIFIC RULES FOR FACULTY:

Most faculty members do not have personal leave. Additionally, many faculty members are not on contract during the summer. Accordingly, faculty members may engage in advocacy activities related to a campaign issue during months in which they are not on contract, or during the school year in accordance with applicable department or campus policies on use of personal time.

However, faculty members should avoid the appearance of impropriety by clarifying wherever possible that such activities are being conducted on personal time and not on behalf of or at the request of the university.

Faculty members remain subject to other limitations on the use of state resources, including university email, even if using personal time.

SPECIFIC RULES FOR STUDENTS:

Students may engage in political expression without limitation, except that they may not use university resources in advocating for or against a campaign issue.

Money generated through student fees and equipment or materials purchased with student fees are considered university resources.

Student groups are free to organize for advocacy purposes. If an advocacy group raises monies other than student fees for the purposes of campaign advocacy, they may not commingle such monies—they must maintain separate accounts.

WHAT ARE UNIVERSITY EMPLOYEES ALLOWED TO DO?

University employees may provide information in response to questions posed in the ordinary course of their duties, even if the information provided relates to a ballot issue, so long as the question was not solicited by a State employee.

The Board of Regents may pass a resolution adopting an advocacy position related to a ballot issue. The resolution may be distributed by any normal and customary means and in response to a question.

Policy-makers such as the President and Chancellors may adopt an opinion related to a ballot issue and spend up to $50.00 publicizing that opinion. If such an opinion is adopted, it may be communicated in response to a question.

Employees may use personal time to engage in any advocacy activities, provided that they do not use State resources. As a general rule, employees should always make it clear that they are taking personal time and that they are not speaking on behalf of the university.

USE OF UNIVERSITY FACILITIES

The university may allow access to its meeting facilities for political expression as public forums or limited public forums. So long as access is not restricted based on viewpoint—i.e., so long as there is equal access to advocates on all sides of an issue—the resource is not being used for advocacy.

The university may allow a meeting room to be used by an advocacy group, so long as the same or similar space is available to any opposing advocacy group. Forums offered to provide information about a ballot issue should include both sides of the ballot issue. However, student advocacy groups may invite a candidate to speak without inviting opposing candidates, so long as other student advocacy groups are afforded the same opportunities to invite opposing candidates to speak.

The university may set additional reasonable time, place and manner restrictions on these activities. Included, the following rules are advisable:
Attendance must be open to the public or to all students.
A disclaimer must be made on any printed materials and/or at the event that the university does not endorse the candidate, and that any opposing candidate or advocacy group will be offered a similar opportunity to speak.

THESE GUIDELINES ARE NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR UNDERSTANDING AND COMPLYING WITH APPLICABLE LAW OR UNIVERSITY POLICY AND ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THESE GUIDELINES OR POLITICAL ACTIVITIES IN GENERAL SHOULD BE DIRECTED TO THE OFFICE OF STATE AND FEDERAL RELATIONS OR THE OFFICE OF UNIVERSITY COUNSEL.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

No really...

So, apparently it was just a brief coma as Frasier has once again rejoined the land of the living, and without a visit to the white palace. Now, I just have to be on the lookout for signs of another slip.

In a coma....

Frasier is in a coma.... let us all hope that a quick trip to the white palace can save him... and his memory. Until then, Lilith will have to keep me company.

More to come...

Ok, I'll eventually post my take on the midterm elections but I just couldn't resist this jem.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

North Korea

So, while listening to the President's press conference this morning (I changed the channel thinking I was going to get to watch The View which was preempted for the conference) I was taken back by how willing Bush is to stay the course of diplomatic resolution of the North Korea nuclear bomb testing. He is standing firm that the international community can take care of the issue and that he will only go to military action as a last result. He also said similar things about Iran. While listening two things came to mind:

1) Isn't this the same thing he said about Iraq, and we were at war less than a year later? Can we really afford a second and third disaster?

2) Why is he so willing to stand by diplomacy with Iran and North Korea where he seemed gung ho to go into Iraq. First I thought that maybe he realizes that North Korea and Iran would reslult in massive casualties and would most likely require the draft to build the military force large enough to take on the two new fronts. Further, he was so willing to go into Iraq because, in spite of his pre-war press, he knew that Iraq did not pose a significant threat because there were no WMD. In the cases of Iran and North Korea, we know that they have nuclear capability and are in possession of weapons that would mean a totally different battle from the one that we fight in Iraq.

Or, maybe it is just his PR team hasn't quite figured out how to sell W W III.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Why not?

I want to know 20 things about you.
I don't care if we've never talked, never liked each other, or if we already know everything about each other.
I really don't.

1.Your Middle Name:

2. Age:

3. Single or Taken:

4. Favorite Movie:

5. Favorite Song:

6. Favorite Band/Artist:

7. Dirty or Clean:

8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:

HERE COMES THE FUN ... ... ...

1. Do we know each other outside of blogging?

2. Whats your philosophy on life?

3. Would you have my back in a fight?

4. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?

5. What is your favorite memory of us?

6. Would you give me a kidney?

7. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:

8. Would you take care of me when I'm sick?

9. Can we get together and make a cake?

10. Have you heard any rumors of me lately?

11. Do you/have you talk(ed) crap about me?

12. Do you think I'm a good person?

13. Would you drive across country with me?

14. Do you think I'm attractive?

15. If you could change anything about me, would you?

16. What do you wear to sleep?

17. Would you come over for no reason just to hang out?

18. Would you go on a date with me if I asked you?

19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?

20. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?

Sunday, October 08, 2006

One less French joke to tell...

The French government has begun the process of banning smoking in public places with the full effect of the law coming into place by 2008. The new law would ban smoking in most public places including bars and clubs. France is often thought of as the country where everyone smokes, but this is the new France, and in the new France, even smokers want to ban smoking.

Story

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Where oh where have I been?

If you are wondering where I have been lately..... here is an example of where my mind has been in the past month and a half.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

The Root of the Problem

So, perhaps the reason that NeoConservative Republicans have problems supporting gay rights is that they confuse the issue. Every time the issue comes up, they are always the first to go to child molestation etc.. I suppose it is because they haven't met any healthy open gay men or womyn only the perverts in their own ranks.

Story

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Some Sweet Day

Some sweet day, I'll make it closer to the top of the pile of homework steadily building around me and regain contact with the outside world.... some day.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Chavez Remarks

DO NOT TRUST any media coverage of this speech. Read it for yourself and make your own opinions from what he actually said and not how it is being presented. Educate yourself open your mind and allow your own ideas to form:


The following is a transcript of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez's address to the 61st General Assembly of the United Nations, September 20, 2006:

HUGO CHAVEZ, PRESIDENT OF VENEZUELA (THROUGH TRANSLATOR): ... over our heads. I had considered reading from this book, but for the sake of time, I shall just leave it as a recommendation. It reads easily. It's a very good book. I'm sure, Madam, you are familiar with it.

(APPLAUSE)

The book is in English, in Russian, in Arabic, in German.

I think that the first people who should read this book are our brothers and sisters in the United States, because their threat is in their own house. The devil is right at home. The devil — the devil, himself, is right in the house.

And the devil came here yesterday.

(APPLAUSE)

Yesterday, the devil came here. Right here. Right here. And it smells of sulfur still today, this table that I am now standing in front of.

Yesterday, ladies and gentlemen, from this rostrum, the president of the United States, the gentleman to whom I refer as the devil, came here, talking as if he owned the world. Truly. As the owner of the world.

I think we could call a psychiatrist to analyze yesterday's statement made by the president of the United States. As the spokesman of imperialism, he came to share his nostrums, to try to preserve the current pattern of domination, exploitation and pillage of the peoples of the world.

An Alfred Hitchcock movie could use it as a scenario. I would even propose a title: "The Devil's Recipe."

As Chomsky says here, clearly and in depth, the American empire is doing all it can to consolidate its system of domination. And we cannot allow them to do that. We cannot allow world dictatorship to be consolidated.

The world parent's statement — cynical, hypocritical, full of this imperial hypocrisy from the need they have to control everything.

They say they want to impose a democratic model. But that's their democratic model. It's the false democracy of elites, and, I would say, a very original democracy that's imposed by weapons and bombs and firing weapons.

What a strange democracy. Aristotle might not recognize it or others who are at the root of democracy.

What type of democracy do you impose with marines and bombs?

The president of the United States, yesterday, said to us, right here, in this room, and I'm quoting, "Anywhere you look, you hear extremists telling you can escape from poverty and recover your dignity through violence, terror and martyrdom."

Wherever he looks, he sees extremists. And you, my brother — he looks at your color, and he says, oh, there's an extremist. Evo Morales, the worthy president of Bolivia, looks like an extremist to him.

The imperialists see extremists everywhere. It's not that we are extremists. It's that the world is waking up. It's waking up all over. And people are standing up.

I have the feeling, dear world dictator, that you are going to live the rest of your days as a nightmare because the rest of us are standing up, all those who are rising up against American imperialism, who are shouting for equality, for respect, for the sovereignty of nations.

Yes, you can call us extremists, but we are rising up against the empire, against the model of domination.

The president then — and this he said himself, he said: "I have come to speak directly to the populations in the Middle East, to tell them that my country wants peace."

That's true. If we walk in the streets of the Bronx, if we walk around New York, Washington, San Diego, in any city, San Antonio, San Francisco, and we ask individuals, the citizens of the United States, what does this country want? Does it want peace? They'll say yes.

But the government doesn't want peace. The government of the United States doesn't want peace. It wants to exploit its system of exploitation, of pillage, of hegemony through war.

It wants peace. But what's happening in Iraq? What happened in Lebanon? In Palestine? What's happening? What's happened over the last 100 years in Latin America and in the world? And now threatening Venezuela — new threats against Venezuela, against Iran?

He spoke to the people of Lebanon. Many of you, he said, have seen how your homes and communities were caught in the crossfire. How cynical can you get? What a capacity to lie shamefacedly. The bombs in Beirut with millimetric precision?

This is crossfire? He's thinking of a western, when people would shoot from the hip and somebody would be caught in the crossfire.

This is imperialist, fascist, assassin, genocidal, the empire and Israel firing on the people of Palestine and Lebanon. That is what happened. And now we hear, "We're suffering because we see homes destroyed.'

The president of the United States came to talk to the peoples — to the peoples of the world. He came to say — I brought some documents with me, because this morning I was reading some statements, and I see that he talked to the people of Afghanistan, the people of Lebanon, the people of Iran. And he addressed all these peoples directly.

And you can wonder, just as the president of the United States addresses those peoples of the world, what would those peoples of the world tell him if they were given the floor? What would they have to say?

And I think I have some inkling of what the peoples of the south, the oppressed people think. They would say, "Yankee imperialist, go home." I think that is what those people would say if they were given the microphone and if they could speak with one voice to the American imperialists.

And that is why, Madam President, my colleagues, my friends, last year we came here to this same hall as we have been doing for the past eight years, and we said something that has now been confirmed — fully, fully confirmed.

I don't think anybody in this room could defend the system. Let's accept — let's be honest. The U.N. system, born after the Second World War, collapsed. It's worthless.

Oh, yes, it's good to bring us together once a year, see each other, make statements and prepare all kinds of long documents, and listen to good speeches, like Abel's (ph) yesterday, or President Mullah's (ph). Yes, it's good for that.

And there are a lot of speeches, and we've heard lots from the president of Sri Lanka, for instance, and the president of Chile.

But we, the assembly, have been turned into a merely deliberative organ. We have no power, no power to make any impact on the terrible situation in the world. And that is why Venezuela once again proposes, here, today, 20 September, that we re-establish the United Nations.

Last year, Madam, we made four modest proposals that we felt to be crucially important. We have to assume the responsibility our heads of state, our ambassadors, our representatives, and we have to discuss it.

The first is expansion, and Mullah (ph) talked about this yesterday right here. The Security Council, both as it has permanent and non-permanent categories, (inaudible) developing countries and LDCs must be given access as new permanent members. That's step one.

Second, effective methods to address and resolve world conflicts, transparent decisions.

Point three, the immediate suppression — and that is something everyone's calling for — of the anti-democratic mechanism known as the veto, the veto on decisions of the Security Council.

Let me give you a recent example. The immoral veto of the United States allowed the Israelis, with impunity, to destroy Lebanon. Right in front of all of us as we stood there watching, a resolution in the council was prevented.

Fourthly, we have to strengthen, as we've always said, the role and the powers of the secretary general of the United Nations.

Yesterday, the secretary general practically gave us his speech of farewell. And he recognized that over the last 10 years, things have just gotten more complicated; hunger, poverty, violence, human rights violations have just worsened. That is the tremendous consequence of the collapse of the United Nations system and American hegemonistic pretensions.

Madam, Venezuela a few years ago decided to wage this battle within the United Nations by recognizing the United Nations, as members of it that we are, and lending it our voice, our thinking.

Our voice is an independent voice to represent the dignity and the search for peace and the reformulation of the international system; to denounce persecution and aggression of hegemonistic forces on the planet.

This is how Venezuela has presented itself. Bolivar's home has sought a nonpermanent seat on the Security Council.

Let's see. Well, there's been an open attack by the U.S. government, an immoral attack, to try and prevent Venezuela from being freely elected to a post in the Security Council.

The imperium is afraid of truth, is afraid of independent voices. It calls us extremists, but they are the extremists.

And I would like to thank all the countries that have kindly announced their support for Venezuela, even though the ballot is a secret one and there's no need to announce things.

But since the imperium has attacked, openly, they strengthened the convictions of many countries. And their support strengthens us.

Mercosur, as a bloc, has expressed its support, our brothers in Mercosur. Venezuela, with Brazil, Argentina, Paraguay, Uruguay, is a full member of Mercosur.

And many other Latin American countries, CARICOM, Bolivia have expressed their support for Venezuela. The Arab League, the full Arab League has voiced its support. And I am immensely grateful to the Arab world, to our Arab brothers, our Caribbean brothers, the African Union. Almost all of Africa has expressed its support for Venezuela and countries such as Russia or China and many others.

I thank you all warmly on behalf of Venezuela, on behalf of our people, and on behalf of the truth, because Venezuela, with a seat on the Security Council, will be expressing not only Venezuela's thoughts, but it will also be the voice of all the peoples of the world, and we will defend dignity and truth.

Over and above all of this, Madam President, I think there are reasons to be optimistic. A poet would have said "helplessly optimistic," because over and above the wars and the bombs and the aggressive and the preventive war and the destruction of entire peoples, one can see that a new era is dawning.

As Sylvia Rodriguez (ph) says, the era is giving birth to a heart. There are alternative ways of thinking. There are young people who think differently. And this has already been seen within the space of a mere decade. It was shown that the end of history was a totally false assumption, and the same was shown about Pax Americana and the establishment of the capitalist neo-liberal world. It has been shown, this system, to generate mere poverty. Who believes in it now?

What we now have to do is define the future of the world. Dawn is breaking out all over. You can see it in Africa and Europe and Latin America and Oceanea. I want to emphasize that optimistic vision.

We have to strengthen ourselves, our will to do battle, our awareness. We have to build a new and better world.

Venezuela joins that struggle, and that's why we are threatened. The U.S. has already planned, financed and set in motion a coup in Venezuela, and it continues to support coup attempts in Venezuela and elsewhere.

President Michelle Bachelet reminded us just a moment ago of the horrendous assassination of the former foreign minister, Orlando Letelier.

And I would just add one thing: Those who perpetrated this crime are free. And that other event where an American citizen also died were American themselves. They were CIA killers, terrorists.

And we must recall in this room that in just a few days there will be another anniversary. Thirty years will have passed from this other horrendous terrorist attack on the Cuban plane, where 73 innocents died, a Cubana de Aviacion airliner.

And where is the biggest terrorist of this continent who took the responsibility for blowing up the plane? He spent a few years in jail in Venezuela. Thanks to CIA and then government officials, he was allowed to escape, and he lives here in this country, protected by the government.

And he was convicted. He has confessed to his crime. But the U.S. government has double standards. It protects terrorism when it wants to.

And this is to say that Venezuela is fully committed to combating terrorism and violence. And we are one of the people who are fighting for peace.

Luis Posada Carriles is the name of that terrorist who is protected here. And other tremendously corrupt people who escaped from Venezuela are also living here under protection: a group that bombed various embassies, that assassinated people during the coup. They kidnapped me and they were going to kill me, but I think God reached down and our people came out into the streets and the army was too, and so I'm here today.

But these people who led that coup are here today in this country protected by the American government. And I accuse the American government of protecting terrorists and of having a completely cynical discourse.

We mentioned Cuba. Yes, we were just there a few days ago. We just came from there happily.

And there you see another era born. The Summit of the 15, the Summit of the Nonaligned, adopted a historic resolution. This is the outcome document. Don't worry, I'm not going to read it.

But you have a whole set of resolutions here that were adopted after open debate in a transparent matter — more than 50 heads of state. Havana was the capital of the south for a few weeks, and we have now launched, once again, the group of the nonaligned with new momentum.

And if there is anything I could ask all of you here, my companions, my brothers and sisters, it is to please lend your good will to lend momentum to the Nonaligned Movement for the birth of the new era, to prevent hegemony and prevent further advances of imperialism.

And as you know, Fidel Castro is the president of the nonaligned for the next three years, and we can trust him to lead the charge very efficiently.

Unfortunately they thought, "Oh, Fidel was going to die." But they're going to be disappointed because he didn't. And he's not only alive, he's back in his green fatigues, and he's now presiding the nonaligned.

So, my dear colleagues, Madam President, a new, strong movement has been born, a movement of the south. We are men and women of the south.

With this document, with these ideas, with these criticisms, I'm now closing my file. I'm taking the book with me. And, don't forget, I'm recommending it very warmly and very humbly to all of you.

We want ideas to save our planet, to save the planet from the imperialist threat. And hopefully in this very century, in not too long a time, we will see this, we will see this new era, and for our children and our grandchildren a world of peace based on the fundamental principles of the United Nations, but a renewed United Nations.

And maybe we have to change location. Maybe we have to put the United Nations somewhere else; maybe a city of the south. We've proposed Venezuela.

You know that my personal doctor had to stay in the plane. The chief of security had to be left in a locked plane. Neither of these gentlemen was allowed to arrive and attend the U.N. meeting. This is another abuse and another abuse of power on the part of the Devil. It smells of sulfur here, but God is with us and I embrace you all.

May God bless us all. Good day to you.

(APPLAUSE)

Monday, September 18, 2006

Ladel Rat Rotten Hut

Wants pawn term, dare worsted ladle gull hoe lift wetter murder inner ladle cordage, honor itch offer lodge dock florist. Disk ladle gull orphan worry ladle cluck wetter putty ladle rat hut, an fur disk raisin pimple colder Ladle Rat Rotten Hut.

Wan moaning, Rat Rotten Hut's murder colder inset, "Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, heresy ladle basking winsome burden barter an shirker cockles. Tick disk ladle basking tutor cordage offer groin-murder hoe lifts honor udder site offer florist. Shaker lake! Dun stopper laundry wrote! An yonder nor sorghum-stenches, dun stopper torque wet strainers!"

"Hoe-cake, murder," resplendent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut, an tickle ladle basking an stuttered oft. Honor wrote tutor cordage offer groin-murder, Ladle Rat Rotten Hut mitten anomalous woof. "Wail, wail, wail!" set disk wicket woof, "Evanescent Ladle Rat Rotten Hut! Wares are putty ladle gull goring wizard ladle basking?"

"Armor goring tumor groin-murder's," reprisal ladle gull. "Grammar's seeking bet. Armor ticking arson burden barter an shirker cockles."

"O hoe! Heifer blessing woke," setter wicket woof, butter taught tomb shelf, "Oil tickle shirt court tutor cordage offer groin-murder. Oil ketchup wetter letter, an den - O bore!"

Soda wicket woof tucker shirt court, an whinney retched a cordage offer groin-murder, picked inner widow, an sore debtor pore oil worming worse lion inner bet. Inner flesh, disk abdominal woof lipped honor bet an at a rope. Den knee poled honor groin-murder's nut cup an gnat-gun, any curdled dope inner bet.

Inner ladle wile, Ladle Rat Rotten Hut a raft attar cordage, an ranker dough belle. "Comb ink, sweat hard," setter wicket woof, disgracing is verse. Ladle Rat Rotten Hut entity bet rum an stud buyer groin-murder's bet.

"O Grammar!" crater ladle gull, "Wood bag icer gut! A nervous sausage bag ice!"

"Battered lucky chew whiff, doling," whiskered disk ratchet woof, wetter wicket small.

"O Grammar, water bag noise! A nervous sore suture anomolous prognosis!"

"Battered small your whiff," insert a woof, ants mouse worse waddling.

"O Grammar, water bag mousy gut! A nervous sore suture bag mouse!"

Daze worry on-forger-nut gulls lest warts. Oil offer sodden, thoroughing offer carvers an sprinkling otter bet, disk curl and bloat-thursday woof ceased pore Ladle Rat Rotten Hut an garbled erupt.

Mural: Yonder nor sorghum stenches shut ladle gulls stopper torque wet strainers.

Taken from Exploratorium

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Tunes I Just Couldn't Live Without

For what it's worth:

Mad World (Gary Jules), this song was love at first sound. I saw the video at the Telluride Film Festival a few years ago during a Michel Gondry program and fell in love. The simple construction and sound of the song stuck with me and I have never been able to let it go.

The Stairs (INXS) is still one of my favorite concert moments of my life. INXS was the first concert I bought my own ticket for and went to without my parents. A neighbor boy and I went and it was amazing. I want to use this song in a film, in fact the scene is written in my head and I don't know that I could ever see the scene I have without these words. My favorite part is the pause two thirds of the way through the song, a perfect place for a cut.

All Souls Night (Loreena McKennit) still brings back vivid memories of a night so many years ago, fifteen to be exact, the smell of candle wax and the warmth of life on a cold dark Alaskan night. I can't hear this song without thinking about that night and smiling, even though it would begin the avalanche of emotion that would lead to one of the darkest periods of my life.

Natural Woman (Aretha Franklin) there is something abut Aretha's voice in this song. I have no idea what my specific connection to this song is other than to say that it moves me each time I hear it. This is one of my favorite songs to listen to first thing in the morning. I think it is a great way to start my day.

The Wall (Pink Floyd), I once sold this album when I really needed the money. When it came back into my life, I vowed that I would always have a hard copy of it and so far, I've kept that promise. Personally I think this is the greatest whole concept album that I have ever heard. Every time I hear a song it makes me want to listen to the whole album from the beginning to the end. This album is also tied to one of my most vivid childhood memories. It was the first time I have ever heard the album and I can still remember almost every small detail of the night. My favorite song Mother still makes me stop whatever I am doing and listen to it every time it comes on my iTunes.

Mind Bomb (The The) is among my favorite whole albums. This is one of the very few cds that I have always had with me. I can't tell you the first time I listened to it but I can bet it was dark, late and loud. The album is political, sexual and intense. I love it.

Mississippi Goddam (Nina Simone) and she means every word of it. If you haven't heard this song, run out and get it now. Listen to it, feel it and live it. No matter how old the recording, the song still has resonance today. Whenever I feel like stepping off the trail and allowing the harbingers of hate get to me, Nina helps. Seriously a great song to get the juices flowing.

Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Green Day) is my favorite song to plug into and walk across campus. This is the best soundtrack to have on campus lost in a sea of faces and not connecting with any of them.

Gold Watch and Chain (Garrison Keillor & Meryl Streep) is a recent addition to the list but I don't know what I ever did without this great piece of Americana. Their voices meld together to form the memory of a Nation that I never knew and probably never will. The banjo and fiddle are lost in the world of electronics we currently find ourselves in and I think we are worse off for the loss.

Why? (Tracy Chapman) give me Mississippi Goddam and Why? and I'll start the revolution. One of my favorite lyrics ever is in this song: "The time is coming soon when the blind remove their blinders and the speechless speak the truth."

And last but not least....

La Vie Bohem (Rent) brings out all the things in me I wish I could be and has my second most favorite lyric "The opposite of war isn't peace, it's creation."

Thursday, September 14, 2006

A Hard Days Work

According to the CBS website, President George W. Bush acknowledged that the hardest part of his job is connecting the war in Iraq to the war on terror. Perhaps if he has to work that hard at it; it doesn't exist. Just a thought.

A Light Extinguished

"Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels." -- Ann Richards

You will be missed, at least by me.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Alive and Well

In recent years the move to have a more civil and politically correct society has, in my opinion, done nothing to actually cure race relations in our Nation. Instead, it has only turned it into a closet issue where racists feel not that they should amend their hateful ways, but that they can no longer spew their hatred openly. So what is a blatantly racist person to do? Turn to the internet.

I have written on the Rants and Raves section of craigslist.org previously but I feel like I should comment again on a string of shocking and racists post currently on the Denver site. I feel fixated on these posts because I believe that they reflect the current state of our society and culture as a whole.

First, because of political correctness, people no longer feel comfortable being out about their racism. Of course, the racism of the past is still quite alive and well in our Nation. Only people no longer feel comfortable speaking their racist views aloud. However, the relative anonymity of the internet allows people to express their views openly. The freedom to express one's point of view isn't limited to racism. Internet posters often tackle issues of sexuality, gender, nationality and political ideology. These rants are not limited to targeted "free speech zones" like craig's list either. Often reading other sites, such as movie responses on IMDB, one can also find language that people would not feel comfortable to express face to face. So instead, they post it on the internet.

Second, the "shock and awe" impact of the language some of these posters use is another example on how the dialogue surrounding real important issues that face our Nation have been reduced to utter insanity. In a world where Ann Coulter, Bill O'Reilly, Rush Limbaugh and Micheal Savage run the airways and drive the political dialogue, it isn't surprising that race relations are reduced to name calling. Instead of actually addressing the issues at hand, we can rely on childish responses and the fact that we can always fall back on spin, infancy and outright lies when we need to.

Third, one of my largest criticisms of those who espouse hate often only feel comfortable doing so from the back of the room where they can safely toss hate bombs and run. I am reminded of a rally we held on the CSU campus on National Coming Out Day several years ago. A group of GLBTQQS students gathered on the stump to talk about NCOD and what it meant for us to come out of the closet. The talk turned slightly political when a small line of College Republicans standing at the back of the crowd wearing "God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve, Support Amendment 2" t-shirts were invited to stand before the gathered crowd and share their comments. They declined the challenge and chose instead to continue to stand in the back and attempt to intimidate those of us who were willing to stand up before a crowd and speak our minds. They, like many of those who share their views, were afraid to speak them aloud before the very people they would silently protest.

That is the difference between the current progressive and the neoconservative movement. As progressives, we are more than willing to stand up and publicly declare our beliefs and challenge those who oppose. We believe in open dialogue between ideas and that great things can come from open and honest discussion on the issues that face our Nation and World. I am very frustrated by the students in my college courses who will voice their disagreement with what the professor is saying quietly, privately but not openly in class. Instead, they will retreat to their neoconservative strongholds and complain about how their liberal professor is indoctrinating young minds to the liberal point of view.

My challenge is this, if you disagree with what I write, speak up. Don't just read and silently complain; sign your name and send me your email address. We can open a discussion and hopefully both learn more about ourselves and what we believe. Then I would imagine we would be on the road to a better Nation. I know it is difficult for someone who has been told that dissent and critical thinking is the devil's right hand to break out of that and think on your own but some of the Republicans and yes even NeoConservatives that I respect most are the ones that do just that. If we all take a moment of our day and speak out engage in discussion then maybe we can move beyond our labels and come to a consensus and find that we probably agree more than many would think.

And that is Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

Sunday, September 10, 2006

A Week In Review

For the past two weeks, we have been off our schedule. It seems like we have been going nonstop but have little to show for it. We are feeling the extent of our poverty this week and it is going to be a difficult one to get through. I know we will but, it ain't gonna be easy.

So far, the school semester has been going well. I am really enjoying my classes and have had the chance to step into the teaching role, something I love more with each opportunity.

We really want to move out of our apartment but won't have the money to do so for quite some time. We stepped down as building managers, even though the building doesn't seem to know it yet, after we realize that we just weren't made out to be apartment building managers. We went from being private occupiers of an apartment to being the building's parents. Some of these people living here should never have left home. Last night at 11 PM I was dealing with a feud between two neighbors, one who's music is too loud and the other who locks their puppy in the bathroom for hours and hours on end instead of properly house training it.

I am meeting today with an small independent business owner to talk about picking up a part-time job. Mostly weekends and evenings to help us with some more money. I have been fighting the need to get work but we recently realized that my not working isn't a realistic goal. So, it is off to work I go.

Val and I are both really ready to move on to the next stage of our life, we just need to really try and make it happen realistically. We want a house, a car and even a child. I hate to think that it is age, or that I have finally succumb to the American Dream, but these are the things that now occupy my mind more than anything. Maybe it is just a phase..

So, where do I go from here? Who the hell knows. Until then, I will be along for the journey and hope that some of you come along with me.

Shaych

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Pninko Commie

You are a

Social Liberal
(83% permissive)

and an...

Economic Liberal
(5% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Socialist




Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid
Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Another Day

When I woke up this morning, I was seduced first thing by the E! top 101 guilty pleasures. After watching the program for far too long, I began to ask myself "Is my understanding of myself and the world gaining anything by continuing to watch this program?". The answer was obviously no and the irony that I was enjoying one of my guilty pleasures (top 100 anything shows) on guilty pleasures wasn't enough for me to continue so I stopped at number 10 and walked away from the television. I also found it quite interesting how many of the top 101 guilty pleasures were products that could be easily advertised on some cheesy excuse for a countdown show. Oh well, I live in a capitalist society so I should stop bitching, right?

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

"At what point shall we expect the approach of danger? By what means shall we fortify against it? Shall we expect some transatlantic military giant, to step the Ocean, and crush us at a blow? Never! All the armies of Europe, Asia and Africa combined, with all the treasure of the earth (our own excepted) in their military chest; with a Buonaparte for a commander, could not by force, take a drink from the Ohio, or make a track on the Blue Ridge, in a trial of a thousand years. At what point, then, is the approach of danger to be expected? I answer, if it ever reach us it must spring up amongst us. It cannot come from abroad. If destruction be our lot, we must ourselves be its author and finisher. As a nation of freemen, we must live through all time, or die by suicide. " -- Abraham Lincoln

The Previous Post

So, as I am sure many of you have guessed, we didn't actually adopt a child. Anastasia is my cousin's daughter she was just over for a visit. Though I will admit.... I've kind of got the bug.

Monday, August 28, 2006

A New Addition

Yesterday, we adopted a little baby girl... her name is Anastasia. Here are the photos:

The Breakup

Them - "I broke up with him."
Him - "No, I broke up with you."
Me - "Who gives a f---?"

And that is, Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Week One

I have finished my first week of class and while I can already tell that it is going to be intellectually exhausting, I don't know if it is actually going to be as much work as I originally thought it was going to be. The only snag so far seems to be that the film production students really don't like the history class that they have to take, really don't like it. Oh well.

I came across a lovely piece on 365 Gay.com that caught my eye and is Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought. Apparently putting a President in the White House isn't enough for Florida Senate Hopeful Katherine Harris. According to a new interview, she thinks God should be there as well. I love it when the Right makes it easy for me.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

My Very Eager Mother Just Served Us Nine.....

It's official. The solar system now only consists of eight planets after Pluto's demotion to simply a really big rock. Worldwide students of astronomy will be asked to strike Pluto from their books writing R.I.P. and today's date and will be forced to memorize new pneumonic devices to remember the planets. Very eager mothers will no longer be serving nine anything. Groups of Pluto supporters will mourn the decision to demote the planet today as we try to adjust to life with just eight planets. Not to mention the fact that I will now have to buy a brand new book for Astronomy next semester beacuse this means a new edition.

And now for Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought:

I have often equated the struggle for GLBTQQS rights with the struggle for racial equality in the United States. Whenever I hear some conservative member of Congress complain about the same-sex marriage rulings (which have been going their way lately) citing activist judges and how the judicial branch of government has overstepped its bounds I am reminded that they said the same thing about Brown v. Board of Education. I have continued to assert that the battle we face for equality is much the same battle of all the other civil rights movements.

Now, thanks to a Conservative Lawmaker in Utah, I can once again bring up this issue. Utah State Rep. Chris Buttars (R) has introduced legislation that would allow the Utah Legislature to remove a judge from the bench if it disagrees with a ruling of the court. I can't even begin to go into how much of a violation of the three branches of government this is but let's deal with what he also said. When pressed about other civil rights cases that have been heard before a court, Buttars stated that Brown was "wrong to begin with." Now I suppose that there is some perfectly sane reason that he would feel this way but I doubt it.

So, whenever you hear some conservative lawmakers talking about taking away the rights of GLBTQQS citizens, remember that those aren't the only ones they would really like to attack, if given the opportunity.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

What does my future hold?

On our trip to my grandmother's house I realized two things:

1) I want a house. Preferably one large enough so that we can have work and living space in one structure and with a yard big enough for our puppy to be able to roam and exercise.

2) This home may in fact be here in Colorado. After years of fighting to leave the state of my birth, I realize that the unhappiness I feel here, I would most likely feel elsewhere as well. Home is where the heart is and my heart is here in Denver. I still would love to live in Europe or some other amazing city but the most important thing for me to learn is that I should be happy where I am. Geographic location will not bring happiness only I can.

This realization has begun to have an affect on other areas of my life. As I near the completion of my undergraduate studies, I am faced with the decision of where to go from here. I have spent so many months and years fighting what is inside of me in order to mold my future into something that I thought it should be, not what I wanted it to be. There may not seem to be a difference between these two things but there is. I had always had this image in my mind and fantasy that I thought I should be molding my life to. This focus has caused me to miss out on and deny myself some great opportunities. I think that it is time that I just allow the natural flow of things and if I end up in the world of my dreams, so much the better. However, if the path takes me to something that I could never have dreamed of, then that is where I am supposed to be.

All to often I have tried way to hard and focused way to much on the future that the present has escaped me. Only when I have taken it day-by-day have I been able to achieve anything. The most amazing thing is that I realize that I have accomplished what I set out to do even when I thought I was doing something else.

I apologize if this post is a large random rant of ideas, but I needed it to get out. What it all boils down to is this: I want to spend the rest of my life writing about, teaching and making films. I think I have always wanted to do it but for some reason I am only now realizing that I can do it. That it is possible for me to actually be what I want to be and as long as I don't get tangled up in my own drama and obsession of the future, I can make it happen.

Gads, my therapist would be so proud... are you out there Paul?

Sunday, August 20, 2006

A Couple of Days Away

Val and I usually try and get out of town for a couple of days before each semester starts and relax before the insanity begins. This fall, I will be starting my senior year of undergraduate studies and I have the full schedule to prove it.

Our trips out of town usually involve visiting my grandmother in Carbondale and her wonderful garden. Unfortunately, there isn't much to do at night up there so we tend to end up spending our evenings staring at each other but the days are filled with great mountain town fun. This time we were able to take our little girl Sue to meet her great-grandmother and let's just say they hit it off quite well. It has been a long time since I have seen my grandmother smile and play like she did with Sue. She kept bringing out more toys, bones and things for Sue to play with. At some point I realized that my grandmother was treating her not like our pet but as though she were our actual daughter.

My grandparents bought their house in the late 1950s when they moved to the country and my grandmother has been working the large garden since. Her yard is different each time we visit with flowers and vegetables moved about the garden in an attempt to keep her busy in her retirement days. It has been about thirteen years since my grandfather died and about a year since her companion of several years passed on as well. She has lived such a dynamic and often tragic life and the years are beginning to show. From her I have learned the language of my cultural heritage and how to be a better person, not just by example but often what not to do.

Since she is alone in a large house built over 115 years ago, we often do some work for her when we go up. This time, we cleaned out one of the upstairs bedrooms and repainted the wallpapered walls. Let me take a moment to dispense some advice: NEVER EVER EVER wallpaper anything. It is a pain in the ass to take down, save yourself the trouble and just don't put it up in the first place. After fighting for hours getting as much of the paper off the walls as humanly possible, we primered and painted. Fingers crossed, the paint will stay on the wall.

In addition to remodeling, we played some mini golf and lounged poolside at the Hot Springs so all in all, it was a good trip.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

A flooded Mary's


image2733
Originally uploaded by Shayachern.
It rained hard yesterday. Our neighborhood was flooded again when the drains failed to keep up with the downpour. It doesn't rain often anymore but when it does, it pours.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Save Pluto!

Save Pluto... write your Congress, Governor and President. We musn't let these intellectual midweights redinfine our God created Universe. Save Pluto!

And That's Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought.

Friday, August 11, 2006

TWFT Mirror Mirror on The Wall...

I suppose the title isn't 100% accurate but I couldn't come up with a pithy saying for a crystal ball... give me a break, I'm tired.

As I approach my senior year, I realize that I am going to be faced with the decision of what to do after graduation sooner than I had hoped. I know that I want to continue my education and pursue at least my masters and perhaps even my doctorate and after a great deal of soul searching I think I actually know what I want to do with the next few years of my life. It is strange to be at my age and looking down the path and not knowing where it leads, even though I know what it looks like.

The problem really is that I don't know how to begin to shop for graduate programs. I ended up in the undergraduate program that I am in mostly out of default. The local university offered a degree in what I wanted to study so, I enrolled. Now that I am looking graduate (and potentially post-graduate) schools I feel like I should actually find the one that will challenge me the most and give me the exact education that I hope for.

When I was young, I had dreams of attending Oxford. I probably saw it in a movie once and fell in love with the idea of studying at one of the oldest and most prestigious schools in the world. Back then, if I had my druthers, I would be Niles; a man with an Oxford education and a Mercedes, living in a old real wood paneled apartment with antiques and a gourmet kitchen. Ah, that was going to be the life.

Instead, I have chosen to take the creative route and now after years of drifting through a degree that really hasn't always challenged me I am faced with the real decision of where to go from here. I have found a number of Universities that offer a program that I am interested in I just have to make the decision of where I want to go and push myself to do what I have to do to make it happen.

Now is the time to make it happen. Now is the time to decide am I a man or a mouse.

That is today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Flying the Friendly Skies

After the foiling of the bombing plot to destroy airplanes flying from the UK to the US, security experts are saying that the real security measures that we need to actually prevent a plane bombing would drastically change how we travel in the air. Already any liquid, gel or cream is banned on flights and the experts are saying more needs to be done.

When we flew from the UK to the US earlier this summer, it seemed like security in the UK was as strict but better integrated into the system than it was when we changed planes in Chicago. In the UK we were scanned etc. (without having to take our shoes off) and our tickets and items were checked several times prior to boarding. When we changed planes in Chicago, we had to enter the domestic terminal and go through security again which was a far different scene. The security agents were screaming at passengers and we apparently missed the bark that told us we had to have our boarding passes for the THIRD time in the security line. We got yelled at and well, we felt like terrorists or at least some sort of common criminal and have never been more insulted in our lives.

I know that they have to keep the skies safe and that airlines seem to be an easy and common target for terrorists because of the number of people in a small space and the relative vulnerability of the passengers aboard. Still, there still has to be some technological way to secure the planes without having to dehumanize the passengers by making them all feel like common criminals. With the new threats and security measures, I dread the next time I have to fly anywhere and have to subject myself to the screenings. I love to travel but, hate to fly.

And that is Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

Recently a number of academics have joined in the growing conspiracy movement questioning the legitimacy of the 9-11 attacks and their repercussions. I am sure following his take on the JFK assassination, many are looking to Oliver Stone's take on the events in question and come up with some sort of equally disturbing theories. Naturally, that isn't the case. One conservative law maker apparently gushed over the film using terms like, "flag waving, gun toting, god fearing Americans read here" blah blah blah blah. This is pretty much what I expected from the trailer... this is a film that follows in the line of Munich, or at least that is my impression. I probably won't see the film at least not right away, but who knows I might be bored one day and out of material for my blog and head down to the local googleplex and see it.

Now, back to the original idea of the conspiracy theories. I have seen a few of the conspiracy films and honestly after about fifteen minutes of their hard to get through production style, I think that it would be difficult for any sane person to sit through two hours of them and not be driven to madness. They repeat the same point over and over again and usually involve some man in a black mask telling us the facts. If they really want to put forth their theories (some of which may be valid) then they should make a straight forward documentary that raises the questions.

I have written before on how I believe that while the US Government didn't necessarily orchestrate the events, bring down the towers with explosives, man the planes etc., but that they did turn a blind eye to the information they were receiving hoping that they could use a catastrophic "pearl harbor" like event to sell their war in Iraq and on terror which they have wanted to wage for a very long time. One need to look no further than the Project for the New American Century for evidence of that. I believe that there are many questions still left unanswered and that we haven't done as much as we could to prepare our Nation for future attacks because we have been caught up in the quagmire that is the Iraq war which was suspiciously substituted for the real "war on terror".

The problem is that we will never know the answer because to know that our government turned a blind eye to the death of thousands of Americans and ignored the warnings that started us down this path, would totally destroy any confidence they have in our bodies of government. No politician would be safe regardless of party affiliation, which is something that they don't want. So, the full truth behind September 11th, like the JFK assassination, will be forever debated in the back halls of conspiracy theorists and never be fully resolved.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

British Petroleum has begun the shutdown of the oil pipeline that runs from Prudhoe Bay to Valdez in Alaska, also known as the backbone of the Alaskan oil industry. They do so citing the aging pipeline has begun to leak oil and in one spot as many as 210,000 gallons of oil has been leaked out into the Alaskan tundra. This shutdown will cost millions of dollars a day, and will most likely have adverse effects on oil and gas prices around the world. I heard one estimate today that because of this, oil could top $80 a barrel.

If we have learned nothing else over the last two years, then we should learn how fragile the oil industry is and how we are being held captive by forces that are out of our control. Like our power grids, the oil field infrastructure needs work but we have become so dependent on it companies are afraid to take it down to make desperately needed repairs. So instead, they will continue to keep it afloat until it finally collapses and we are left in the dark and cold of our own power addictions.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

Sorry I have been so quite lately, we just took over as building managers for our apartment building and it has been a crazy week of really interesting and well disturbing events.

For the questionnaire purists out there (you know who you are), I fixed the question in the questionnaire below to indicate my favorite foods.

And now for Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought:

This morning the test results for Ladis's 'B' test came back positive and he has been fired from his cycling team and stripped of his championship title. What makes a guy think that he can come from 11th place (or 9th can't remember) to win the title in a single day and people won't question if he doped?

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Questions and Stuff

Four jobs you have had in your life:

1. Projectionist
2. Barrista
3. Data Analyst
4. Telemarketer

Four movies you would watch over and over:

1. Night and Fog (Alain Resnais, 1955)
2. The Birdcage (Mike Nichols, 1996)
3. Torch Song Trillogy (Paul Bogart, 1988)
4. American President (Rob Reiner, 1995)

Four places you have lived:

1. Carbondale, CO
2. Anchorage, AK
3. Denver, CO
4. Las Vegas, NV

Four TV shows you love to watch:

1. Murphy Brown
2. Frasier
3. The Simpsons
4. Project Runway (a guilty pleasure)

Four places you have been on vacation:

1. Paris, France
2. Firenze, Italy
3. London, UK
4. Key West, Florida

Four websites you visit daily:

1. Blogs
2. CNN
3. 365gay.com
4. BBC News

Four of your favorite foods:

1. Pasta (absolute favorite pasta? anything involving pesto)
2. Stuffed cabbage (the way my grandma makes it)
3. Mille feuille (a faaab French pastry)
4. Cheesecake (though I shouldn't eat it, well cake of any kind really, god how did I miss this question the first time? I'm starving. )

Four of your favorite books:

1. Saturday, Ian McEwan
2. Magics Pawn, Mercedes Lackey
3. A Density of Souls, Chris Rice
4. Me Talk Pretty One Day, David Sedaris

Four places you would rather be right now:

1. Beach
2. By Water
3. Ocean
4. The Sea

Four places you'd love to visit:

1. Hong Kong
2. Tokyo
3. Egypt
4. Peru

Four foods you don't like:

1. Brussel Sprouts
2. Eggplant
3. Non-fresh Fish
4. Moose Liver

Four friends I am tagging that I think will respond:

1. Val
2. I don't know, it seems like i am the last one to do it.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

No political or social commentary, just an announcement that I have finished class for the summer semester. Now I get two weeks before I start the fall :) Two weeks with little to nothing to do, well other than move, but that is a whole other set of drama.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

At what point do we stop believing the denials of anti-semitism? I am not saying that he is or isn't but at what point, do we no longer believe his sober considered words and start believing what he says off the cuff and drunk?

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Queer v. Queer

An interesting conversation has been taking place on a blog that Girlzoot turned me onto. I have posted a couple of comments and his original posts with my responses have set me to thinking.

The issue discussed has been whether or not the focus of the GLBTQQS (Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning, Straight) rights movement focusing too much on same-sex marriage has actually cause the movement to be set back. While I agree that setbacks have occurred, I don’t agree at all with his response. Have we been given setbacks in the battle for same-sex marriage, yes. Does this mean that it has hurt the GLBTQQS, no. Does this mean we abandon the pursuit of same-sex marriage, absolutely not.

There are some in the GLBTQQS community that don’t support same-sex marriage at all. There are various reasons for this: marriage is an archaic institution, we shouldn’t marry and try to recreate an institution that doesn’t work for the straights, we shouldn’t marry at all, etc. Many otherwise advocates of the GLBTQQS community don’t support same-sex marriage either for the same reasoning. Some of these arguments are valid but they are not good enough to stand idly by as laws are passed that specifically single out same-sex couples for exclusion from the world. There are over 1,000 rights and laws that are integrated with marriage that we are denied access to.

And while it may seem like the battle for same-sex marriage is distracting from the current battles for other rights, it is a fallacy because marriage should have been included from day one and it wasn’t. What we should be fighting for is the full inclusion of members of the GLBTQQS community in all aspects of American life. Unfortunately too many of us became comfortable when we achieved a certain level of equality and our presence in popular culture masked the fact that in a majority of areas of our Nation we are completely without legally protections in employment, marriage, military service, health care, accommodation and the list goes on, but not enough people know it.

I know that the battle for equality is never easy. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. gave his life for what he believed to be right. There were many African Americans that opposed King and his quest for freedom, and much like those in the GLBTQQS community that oppose these battles they were wrong. We should learn from King and continue to fight but there in lies the problem.

Too many members of the GLBTQQS community don’t want to fight. The political apathy that exists in the community at large is even greater in our community. It is really difficult to fight a battle when the troops won’t even show up.

We also need direct leadership in the community and someone to step forward to take the cause to the public and to our political officials and make them accountable for the Queer vote. We have far too many candidates and people in office that are not willing to come to our defense or fight for us in our government. If a candidate does not support our rights then they should not get a SINGLE QUEER VOTE PERIOD. This is a lesson that I have only recently begun to learn, and my writing to my elected officials has not proven to be an emotionally fulfilling task.

I am finally beginning to understand our place in history and realize that I too haven’t been vocal and active enough. I don’t know where to direct my anger and fight but I know that I have to. The dilemma I continue to face, stay and fight or leave and live. The decision is still not made, and I don’t know when or if it ever will.

Till then… read this. No really, if it is the only thing you do today read it. I am considerig commiting portions of it to memory.

The Bill Arrives....

Lurking in my mailbox today was my tuition bill for school. The highest yet it weighs in a whopping $3,534.50 for the fall semester. Fortunately this semester I have actual federal aid since my loans were exhausted taking summer classes, two of which were in Italy. I can't believe that my tuition is this high for a state college, and a mediocre one at that. Fortunately I am almost done and can begin to pay the even higher tuition rates for graduate school.... why am I doing this again?

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

A few weeks ago, Val and I sold our car. It was hard to depart with her, particularly because my dad had figured out what her major mechanical issues were and she was well on the road to recovery. So for the past few weeks, we've been either on our bikes or on foot, except when we have the fortune of catching rides with friends that are still with vehicle.

The reason we made the final leap to get rid of the car was mostly that we no longer wanted the expense of maintenance and insurance, not to mention the fact that diesel fuel hadn't been much below $3 a gallon in years. It used to be that diesel was cheaper than even the cheapest regular fuel and with our better gas mileage, it all worked out just fine for us. However, now that car companies are once again manufacturing diesel engines for their cars, the prices have gone up and not come down at all. While unleaded gas prices fluctuate a bit, diesel has continued to stay high.

Which brings me to Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought.... Exxon posted its profits for the last quarter and yup, you guessed it... once again record profits for the oil giant. Other companies haven't posted their profits yet but I can't imagine that they aren't going to follow suit. So, when you fill up at the pump and curse the fact that your gas now costs twice as much as anything else in your life, remember that somewhere an oil executive is looking to buy his next toy.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought

The return of the classic "Today's Warm and Fuzzy Thought".

Today the Washington State Supreme Court ruled that the law banning same-sex marriage in the state does not violate the Constitution and marriage rights should only be given to male-female partners. Their reasoning, same-sex couples aren't capable of having children, so for the best interest of children, gay men and women should not be allowed to marry.

Apparently in the majority opinion, some justices even admitted that same-sex marriage will eventually come about, it just should be something for the legislature to handle not the courts. Thank God these justices didn't sit on the Supreme Court during Brown v. Board of Education. We will still be waiting for an end to segregation.

Earlier this month, the highest court in New York ruled similarly.

Here is my thought, if you want to make it about that then make it about that. I would like to see a same-sex partnership sue in the state of Washington that a mixed gender couple who cannot have children naturally should have their marriage nullified. If the legal basis for marriage is whether or not you CAN have children, then make it so. I hereby propose the following Constitutional Amendment (also a return of a favorite of mine):

Marriage shall consist of only a union between two persons that are capable of producing a child. Because children should only be raised in a two parent male/female household, no government support, credit or recognition shall be granted to persons having children that have not entered into a union. All unions sanctioned by the government shall be required to produce at least one child in eighteen months time or the union will be nullified. Divorce will no longer be granted to married persons that have children.

That my friends levels the playing field. Saying that same-sex couples can't marry because they can't have children is a cop out. If you don't want my husband and I to marry, then tell me it is because I am gay and not because I can't have a child.